The Unnamed Gorkamorka Site

We were hunting around for Gorkamorka related stuff online and came across this. It's from WD 216, January 1998, which also featured two other scenarios which we've been unable to find. On the plus side, we're trying to get a copy of the magazine on eBay.

HUNT DA DREAD

An industrious Mek and his Spanners uncovered an old Ork war machine in the wreckage of the Hulk. Dragging it back to his workshop, the Mek set about fixin' it up. However, after loading all its guns, filling up its fuel tank and pressing the big ON button something went seriously wrong. Once activated the machine went on the rampage, killing the Mek and destroying the workshop! It is up to the Orks in the vicinity to destroy the marauding Dread and put an end to its destructive onslaught.

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Here’s an old WD article from WD 219, April 1998, written by Adrian Wood. It’s not particularly great, but worth a look if you’re just starting out building terrain.

No game of Gorkamorka is complete without terrain to fight over. The Gorkamorka boxed game itself has lots of card models inside to get you started from the amazing card fort to the plastic sprues which contain oil drums, barricades and fuel cans. But have you ever though about making some of your own Gorkamorka terrain to go alongside it? Grand Warlord Adrian Wood has a go…

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Transcribed from play-by-play Twitter updates:

Nazgrab’s Yella Deff vs. Da Not So N00bz
Scenario: One of our ladz is missin’ (Da Uvver Book, scenario 7)

Da N00bz are not happy – Nazgrab’s Yella Deff have a couple of their missing lads and their beloved war trukk, Keith.
Not for long, or so goes the plan. A daring raid is attempted whilst most of the mob are away from the fort, wish them luck!

The boyz are out, but some of the older lads are still home, namely Nazgrab, Grimfang and Choppablock.
Unfortunately, only Grimfang manages to dodge the hail of gunfire delivered by Da Not So N00bz as they approach the walls.
Both Nazgrab and Choppablock go down! Dakka! Dakka!

Luckily for Nazgrab, all the commotion was loud enough to be heard by the rest of the mob in a nearby canyon.
Rushing back on both Krunch and Grin, the boyz open fire and cut a swathe through the attackers.

Da Not So N00bz storm the fort, clambering over the walls and freeing their imprisoned comrades.
Nazgrab is back on his feet and attempts a jumping charge from the ramparts. Sadly for him, Eugene has his choppa conveniently waiting for him and the poor Morker nob goes down.
Meanwhile, Choppablock and Grimfang join the melee that has broken out at the foot of the walls. It’s not long before a resounding “thud!” is heard as one of the Gorkers takes Choppablock down. Ouch.

Excellent use of krak stikkbombz sees Da Not So N00bz blow the bloody doors off and fire up Keith.
Nazgrab’s boyz have had enough! They’re offski!
Da Not So N00bz reclaim their boyz and their ride, taking a few moments to leave a few “presents” for the fort’s absent residents..

Result: Victory to Da Not So N00bz

Transcribed from play-by-play Twitter updates:

Nazgrab’s Yella Deff vs. Ross’ Freebootaz (unnamed for now)
Scenario: Lootas (Da Uvver Book, scenario 3)

This time around the tables have been turned, although Da N00bz are nowhere to be found. Instead there appear to be some zoggin’ freebootaz on the rampage.
Krasher mans Krunch’s big grabber again, tearing the bandits’ undercarriage off, immobilising them. Score.

Their ride may be down but these pirates aren’t going to let that keep them down.
On foot they start gathering as much scrap as possible, putting them in a good position to come out the victors of this scrape.

Whatz dat, da boss iz in trubble?! Let'z go!
Grin flies onto the board to help nail these pesky thieves, putting the morkers at a significant advantage in terms of movement.

Seeing reinforcements on the way, the boyz take heart and lay down some covering fire.
Nazgrab's shoota hits da kaptin, but the rich git was wearing armour! Argh!

The backup lads are in the fray now, hopefully they can do some good!

Choppas and blood flies in all directions as a huge scrap breaks out around the freebootaz’ vehicle.
Can they hold steady?

Grimfang has learnt his lesson since last game, picking his targets. Amazingly Mork smiles on him this time.
The slaver charges and then follows up in a split second butchering three freebootaz in one go!

Meanwhile, Nazgrab and Da Kaptin are at each other’s throats.
Steal me scrap?! I’ll clobber yer!

It's all over, with just one freeboota left on the board, they scarpered!

Result: Victory to Nazgrab’s Yella Deff

Transcribed from play-by-play Twitter updates:

Da N00bz vs. Nazgrab’s Yella Deff
Scenario: We Woz ‘Ere Furst (Da Uvver Book, scenario 2)

The bitter rivals have once again found themselves facing off, will Da N00bz take back their stolen pride?
Once again Grimfang, Da Yella Deff’s de facto second in command is manning Grin, the mob’s buggy. Zagwazza goes a little pale as he sees Keith, Da N00bz enormous trukk barrelling towards him!
Argh!

Driving comes naturally to Morkers, otherwise Grin would have been toast. Today Mork smiled upon Zagwazza and Grin pulled through moderately unscathed.
The same could not be said for Keith! Its driver, Leonard, tried valiantly but the lads were headed straight for that very solid-looking hill. Crunch!
That was Keith immobilised again, ouch.

What Da N00bz lack in driving skills, they certainly make up for in sheer numbers. Stacks of warriors spill forth from Keith, blades and shootas at the ready..

Remember Vern from the previous match? He tried to take out the Yella Deff’s first grot, Snik, and got run down in return.
Well, this time Grimfang wasn’t feeling so merciful, his hand-to-hand skills sharp after the last game. Down goes Vern!

Nazgrab’s boys manage to take down four of Da N00bz but is it enough?
Not to be put off so easily, their nerve holds.

Just because a few lads went down, ain’t reason to be giving up. Eugene urges on his boyz!

With Krunch closing in and the rest of Da Yella Deff not far behind, a desperate plan is hatched.
The lads may not be able to make it back to the trukk to claim the scrap on their own, but maybe by passing it from one lad to the other..?
Let’s play “Pass Da Scrap”!

Innovative tactics just weren’t enough. Several of Da N00bz legged it with the scrap they were carrying, but this victory went to Nazgrab, who grabbed two of Da N00bz (and their trukk!) and dragged them back to his fort.

Nazgrab's lads currently hold two captive orks and a trukk. Da N00bz are plotting their revenge..

Result: Victory to Nazgrab’s Yella Deff.